How To Get Fired...the weird version

Sick of your job? Hate your boss? Well, you have come to the right place. In these tough economic times, it is hard to find an up-to-date manual on how to get your boss nuts. So, therefore, I present to you, THIS:
Step One: Draw Embarrassing Pictures of Your Boss on the Wall

 Step Two: Eat.....EVERYTHING!!!

 

 Step Three: Spill all the coffee you can find. Make it epic!! Make it extreme!! Make your co-workers sob!!!

 

Step four: Lick a computer. To make this actually have an effect, do it when someone is watching.

Step five: If you're still not fired, put a cactus in the most unlikely place.

With all this, whoever is reading this is officially fired from any company or agency that I may ever own.