Why I Shouldn't Be a Doctor (AKA a hint to mom)

Hello, my name is Doctor E. I am subbing for your doctor today. Qualified? Of course I'm qualified! I even have a PhD!

 See? Ok, next I want for you to lay down. Yes, right there on the sofa. Next, spit into this cup. SPIT INTO THE CUP, HEAR???. Great!! :) Now let me scan your saliva...

 

Whoops!!

Congratulations, You Just Won A Trip To My House!!!

Alternative Title:
I Drew Some Pictures And  Made Up A Storyline To Go Along With Them...Just Bear With Me

Hello!! How are you? Come in, come in. Let me show you into my room---don't mind the mess.

 

 I see that you are eying the paper on the floor. That can only mean.... you want to color? What was that? You want to borrow a pencil? Sure, let me go to my desk. Oh look at what I found!!! I was wondering where it went!

 

WHAT ARE YOU DOING??? DON'T TOUCH IT!!! You see, it may look harmless...

 

 

So you like my stuff? Oh sniffles, I almost forgot!

I Wrote A Poem About A Turtle And I Want You To Read It

I am basically Aristotle and Shakespeare put together. And Picasso. Wondering what on Earth I am talking about? Well that just adds to the mysterious effect. I present to you, voila!

The Story Of the Turtle:

Once there lived a turtle

whose life was very hard

he worked to collect garbage

to bring to the junkyard.

 

He wanted an adventure

he wanted a new life

and one day quit his job

(his boss was his ex-wife).

 

"Excuse me?" said the woman

"After all I've given?

I let you keep this job

I helped you make a livin'."

"And after all those years?

I've given you so much!

I tried to help you out,

you hard ungrateful wretch!"

 

The man just stood there still,

he never said a word,

as he stroked his beard,

listening to her.

 

The boss she raved and fumed.

He felt no pain or shame!

No shred of small regret,

for what he just explained.

 

She raved and fumed and screamed

her anger now unfolded

she yelled and stamped her feet

and then---she then exploded.

 

Her bits flew in the air,

to travel many places.

All around the state,

hitting people's faces.

 

The turtle was a hero,

for punishing the shrew.

The mayor of the city

made him a statue.

 

The people flocked together,

to catch a little glimpse,

of the mentioned turtle,

once a pauper now a prince.

 If you would like to see more poems like this, click on the like button. If not, click on the dislike button. If you are too lazy to click the mouse, then I cannot help you.